I’ve always thought my spiritual gift was teaching, but this morning I learned through the preacher’s sermon that my strongest gift is exhortation. Oh, I am very strong in teaching, but the definition of the gift of exhortation fits me to a T. According to the dictionary, an exhortation is communication that emphatically urges someone to do something. Synonyms include encouragement, persuasion, pressure, pressurization, pushing, insistence, incitement, goading, egging on, beseeching, admonishment, warning, appealing, lecturing, entreating, and charging. Pretty much my tools of the trade! You see, I was that kid asking, “When am I ever going to use this?” Now that I am a teacher, I make sure kids know when and for what they will use the knowledge. If I can’t think of anything, I don’t bother teaching it. Very rarely do I not find a purpose, though.
I happen to believe that every circumstance is useful for instruction. Because of this, I rarely have secrets. Even my most embarrassing moments will teach. Another example: I tell my kids that they will leave LAAS either a legend or a cautionary tale. It is up to them to decide which. Like I said, every circumstance will teach.
As parents and teachers, it is our job to exhort our children. We needn’t dictate their lives, but we can certainly urge them to make good decision, to plan, to think things through. I do not understand the parent who does not “parent” anymore than I do the one who “over-parents.” There’s a balance. Let me give you an example. My kids had to clean up their rooms; however, within their rooms were large storage crates. The rule was that no food or clothing could go in those crates. Everything else was fair game, though. I know that often everything BUT the food and clothes went into those crates in a mad dash to get done. I got what I wanted… a clean room, and they got what they wanted… to be done quickly. The teaching in this scenario is back-handed. When one of my children needed an item that had been on the floor and then hastily shoved in this box, finding it became a big process. The kids never got totally organized, but they did start shoving less in so they could find things later. Everybody’s happy and a lesson is learned.
Where is the exhortation in that example? I never missed letting my kids know why their rooms must be cleaned, and the reasons ran the gamut between “because that’s my room; you just live in it,” to “we’re practicing for when you go to college. No one wants to live with a health hazard.”
You are a mentor to your children. Please do not miss the chance to persuade, encourage, and charge them. Also, do not fail to admonish, warn and insist. They are worth every bit of effort you put into raising them!
- Michelle