I’ve been told that over a person’s lifetime, he will spend almost five years waiting in lines and six months waiting at traffic lights. Remember not being able to sleep as you waited for Christmas morning to come? I keep waiting to mature enough not to care about having to wait, but...
Waiting is considered a soft skill – a “people” skill - as opposed to a hard skill (a person’s technical skills). It isn’t often listed in the set of soft skills most desired by employers, yet it would be incredibly noticeable if one did not possess the ability to wait. Picture the unskilled “wait-er” in line for the copier or handling the company’s stock options or waiting for the boss to finish an oft-told story.
You and I know the value of waiting. A conflict slept on doesn’t seem quite as big the next morning. Solutions to problems often come after a good night’s sleep. Waiting is hard… for adults and kids alike. In a world of very few delayed gratification opportunities, I do believe potential employees who have cultivated this soft skill will be in high demand. It is our job as parents and teachers to help kids develop this skill. “Wait time” was a popular concept when I first started teaching. The idea was this: when you ask a kid a question, give him time to think and answer… even if there are hands up all around the classroom. At home, your child does not have competition for answering your question, nor does he have to raise his hand. He still needs you to “wait” for an answer, not rush off to do it for him or, worse yet, never ask him any questions in the first place.
First graders can’t wait to be fifth graders; fifth graders can’t wait for middle school; middle schoolers want to be high schoolers; and high schoolers wish they were adult already. No one wants to wait. So much learning takes place in the ”wait,” though. We must teach our children not to wish away opportunities.
This past week, a little waiting might have gone a long way. Our governor declared a state of emergency in all 77 Oklahoma counties, and consequently superintendents around the state made the decision to close schools sixteen hours prior to the start of Friday’s school day instead of waiting to see how quickly the system would arrive. Turns out, the system didn’t come to our area until the weekend, and schools in counties close to us closed for no reason. My mother makes the decision about closures for our school, and much to the chagrin of a worried mother or two, she did not make her decision till two hours before school was slated to start. Even then, her decision was not to close… based upon updated projections for arrival times. By then, however, we knew that us staying open when everyone else in the state was closed would bring a major backlash if the updated forecasts were wrong and the storm did indeed show up earlier. In the end, we opted to be open for those who needed a place for their kids to stay safely while they worked that day. Not the optimum, but it kept me from being ridden out of town on a rail if my secondary students were in school while the rest of the state was out!
Mom and I sing next to each other in the church choir. I had to chuckle when I saw the name of the piece we were singing today: Waiting Here for You. Talk about a recurring theme. In the song, the composer encourages us to wait on a word from the Lord before making a move. Amen. My prayer so many times is, “Please, God, don’t let me run ahead of you!” I don’t want to be that kid, standing at the car, trying desperately to remember what it was you wanted him to get out of the car, but knowing it will never come because as soon as you said, “Go to the car and…” he was gone!
I challenge you this week to look for opportunities to teach your child how to wait. Future bosses will be appreciative!
- Michelle