Go with me on a journey back to the year 2006. It was a simpler time: Hannah Montana had just premiered on Disney Channel, Pluto lost its planetary status, and skinny jeans were the newest trend. That same year Matthew McConaughey and Sarah Jessica Parker co-starred in a movie that’s title would later inspire the name of a syndrome plaguing America’s young adults. The movie was called Failure to Launch, and it featured a 30-something McConaughey still living at home with his parents. Eventually, his parents hire Sarah Jessica Parker to help get their son to move out.

The tagline of this movie was, “To leave the nest, some men just need a little push.” At the time, this romantic comedy shook up the character troupe of the creepy adult son living in his parent’s basement by having the son be seemingly normal and desirable.  The reason this movie was funny was because the idea was so abnormal. Now, a decade later, young adults are taking a page out of McConaughey’s book and living with their parents long after they reach adulthood.

According to a study from May of this year, for the first time in 130 years, more young adults (18-34) are living with their parents than with a partner. 32% of Americans between the ages 18-34 are still living at home with their parents. The study also found that men are more likely to be living at home than women. So basically, it seems that boys in this country went to see this movie with their parents in 2006, and when they grew up, they decided that McConaughey had the right idea.

All of this has resulted in articles in the Huffington Post entitled, “Failure to Launch Syndrome: What You Need to Know to Help Your Dependent Adult Child.” Articles like this talk about how to make the transition easier for your child, but really it just sounds like a lot of enabling to me. I never had the idea that it was an option for me to live at home forever. If your child thinks he can live at home into his 30’s, it’s because you allowed this to be an option. Yes, that sounds harsh, but someone has to take the blame for this problem. There isn’t an increased desire to live at home; there is an increase in parents allowing this type of behavior. If children have had a comfortable life at home, why would they ever want to move out?

Being independent is hard and uncomfortable and sometimes you have to decide if it is more important to buy bread or soap. Who would choose that life if they could stay at home and have everything paid for? There has to come a time when the parent pushes the child out of the nest. For some, this transition comes when the child leaves for college. But now students are living at home to save money, which is fine. For some people that makes the most sense. The problem occurs when parents don’t draw the line with their children. At some point the parents have to say enough is enough and stop crippling their children. Yes, it will be hard on the child initially to move out, but the longer it is delayed, the harder time the child will have adjusting to adult life. Parents think that they are helping their child by allowing him to live with them, but the best thing they can do for their child is to force him to start his independent life.

-        Bria