If I were just writing about focus in general, it would be easy to join the chorus of adults who say that kids cannot focus very long anymore. But, our topic is not focus in general. It’s the focus required for leadership. That’s an entirely different topic.
Focus is very key to leadership. Leaders have to keep focused on a goal, they have to keep their team focused on the right vision, and they themselves have to focus on the most pressing concerns. It is very easy to let every distraction take one’s focus from the mission. Great leaders do not let the distractions become obstacles.
Easy to say; not so easy to practice. The first semester goes so quickly at our school. There are so many events that we barely have time to finish one before we are heavy into the next. Around Christmas, though, the reality that parent/student/teacher conferences are around the corner starts to hit, and students suddenly become focused on their grades. Where diligence has not occurred, students are quick to find others to blame. It becomes very hard for me to keep my focus on the goals because I am always blown away at the lengths to which a gifted child will go not to be responsible for his own actions. Even more disturbing is the parent who helps him.
In my perfect school, parents, students and I discuss areas that need improvement at our conference, and everyone works to help the student improve in that area. I do not understand the idea that an area that needs improvement counts as a failure, and I especially don’t understand the parent who thinks his child needs no improvement. We all need improvement. I personally have such a long way to go to really be great at my job, my marriage, my life.
When I get frustrated that my goals have been sidelined, I try to re-establish my focus. A pitcher is taught to see only the catcher’s glove. He is to let all the fans, the batter, the umpire, the noise all go out of focus, and he is to concentrate on that glove. (Remember Bull Durham?) My focus is on what I am to teach each child who comes to Lawton Academy and what I am to learn form him/her. It is on what I need to do to help the parents of Lawton Academy raise gifted kids. And it is on how I can help those who choose to teach gifted kids be better equipped and feel supported as they do so.
We are about to enter a period of rest across the country. Everyone takes at least a little time off around the holidays. I would encourage your family to sit down and re-examine your focus for the year. If your focus is on the bad around you, your year will be bad… I promise. But if you put your focus on the good you can do and the changes you can make, it’s amazing how much better the year goes.
As parents of gifted kids, we simply must teach our kids to focus on the positive. Intuitively, gifted focus on the negative: where they’ve let others down, where others have disappointed them, why life is not fair, how come they cannot correct injustices. For this reason, many gifted teens are prone to depression. It is your job, Parents, to help your children see the bright side of things and to help them realize that there are just some problems that we will never fully solve. If you spend your evenings bewailing the conditions around your child with him/her, your child will learn that life is awful and not fair, and he will most likely experience depression. But, if you teach your child to use adversity to fuel his action in a positive way, I cannot promise depression still won’t come, but you’re more likely to have a kid who will talk to you or seek help when it does.
There’s a reason the greatest thinkers have told us to “begin with the end in mind,” “press onward toward the goal,” and “think what you want your epitaph to be.” If we “keep our eye on the ball,” we will be successful leaders.
- Michelle